Pixie Vigil -- Buckland St Mary, Somerset

What a controversial time it had been at Buckland St Mary’s. The vigorous debate, by the Parish Council and resident theologians, over the nature of pixies was very animated, touching on such diverse subjects as what it means to be created in the image of God, the mortality opposed to the immortality of the soul, Pauline views on pneuma and psyche, versus Old Testament concepts, especially from the Book of Job and the Books of Solomon on the nature of the soul. The passage that seemed to sway the opinion was from Ecclesiastics 3:19, 20: “For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity. All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.”

I also pointed out to the debaters that pixies, unlike the most of the rest of the faeryfolk, are believed to be related to humans. Some scholars are of the opinion that pixies are a smaller race. How true this view is I do not know. One of the assembled said that it is a fact that sin has degraded humankind through the ages and that if Adam and his immediate offspring were to stand amidst us today in their mostly perfect state we would be like pixies in their sight.

The Parish Council came to the concession that the Reverend may keep a vigil for the pixies as they do have semblance to man, they are inherently sentient beings and that “they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminince above a beast” and therefore, it is plausible that they might “partake of human nature”; who are we to judge the mysteries of God’s creation.

However, although the vigil was approved it was agreed that the pixies may not be buried in the parish’s cemetery as it might entice a fad and before we know it old Mrs. Turnpike will insist on having her dogs buried, because, as the whole Somerset have been told on numerous occasions, Mrs. Turnpike’s dogs are the most intelligent dogs in all of Britain, and that includes those mongrels of Her Majesty, the Queen, and anyone who disagrees will feel the wrath of Mrs. Turnpike inflicted without measure. It was unanimously agreed that the pixies will not be buried at the parish.

Since the question of what to do with the pixies’ remains came up, I asked if we could have it. So far Doctor Tom Holtz have confirmed that the remains are definitely that of pixies and not of ET-pucks. It was a tiny foot that established the fact, as the little foot had more than three toes. ET-pucks are theropods.

I’m still intrigued by the behaviour of these pixies. As I mentioned before, pixies are not naturally drawn to electronics, so what did they do in the PC-box? The other mystery that is still unanswered is who, or what, slaughtered the pixies. And why? Miss Mary Tudor says that she is detecting faint traces of other faeryfolk, but she cannot distinguish the smells clear enough to be able to make any concrete identifications. Might it be ET-pucks that butchered the pixies?

I hope we find some answers soon as we cannot stay here much longer. We are pressed for time. D-day is coming.